to have or have not

I guess ever since Emma has been about one and a half years old, I have been teetering with the idea of whether or not to give her a sibling. I grew up with one and in the back of my head I always thought she would have one as well. But the thing is I never really saw myself as a mom or having a big family; but now I have Emma and she is my world. I love her so much yet I can't help but see how other kids are with their siblings and I think, maybe. It is strange because part of me fears that it wouldn't be possible to ever love another being as much as I love Emma, or that maybe I would want one in the hopes of getting a chance to do it all over again. For whatever reason, I teeter and I plan on taking some more time to figure things out.

End of the school year picnic

Today Emma had her end of the year picnic and I cant believe how the school year flew by. I see how much she has grown and learned, I can hear how much better she speaks and how she is slightly, only slightly, more self controlled. It was a nice, quiet day, and I loved being able to spend my morning with her!! I have been going through some things with Emma in terms of her behavior and I worry about her ability to make friends and play well with others. I  have been feeling pretty bummed lately but today when walked into the classroom one of her classmates approached her and told her the sweetest thing. He said something to the effect of how he was so happy to see her today and that he really wanted her to know that he thinks a lot about her and that she means a lot to him and how he wanted her to hear it from him. My heart melted. It really is a so wonderful when a person can change your day with simple words.

It's been a while

Lord has it...but I promise to be back soon.